Advice from a Pug
J. Lynne Hardesty
always welcome your Persons
with enthusiasm
show your Persons how much they are missed by being everywhere
your Persons are
in need of tending always
demonstrate your love
with cuddles and snuggles, snorts and kisses
comfort and amuse
by immersing yourself in all pastimes
your Persons won’t forget you are there
if you scream like a banshee
when discombobulated
keep an eye on all your Persons
especially when there are refreshments
eat lots
with relish
play lots
with earnestness
sleep lots
whenever possible
remember you are loved
The Call of the Wild
Stuart Watkins
Alaska; think about it:
Gold pans, moose, bear,
Chilkoot Pass, Yukon River,
Athabaskan Indians, Eskimo,
Nome, Iditarod Race, and huskies,
The Northern Lights, Alaska Range,
70 degrees below zero, mukluks,
Caribou herds, Musk Oxen,
Wolverines, Arctic Fox.
Oh, the glory!
But the call of Kentucky Bluegrass,
Kentucky Derby and fancy hats,
kept her there,
while I answered the call.
Orange Cheetos
Stuart Watkins
Oh, how I hate Cheetos;
addictive, orange-colored demons.
Can’t eat one at a time,
must have a handful to satisfy.
Fingers get smeared,
stains appear
on face, lips, and clothes.
Whoever created these treats
must have owned a laundromat
knowing full well
the business Cheetos would bring
washing out the stains.
Federal investigation is demanded.
Do the owners of Cheetos
also own a series of laundromats?
Oh, they are so good to eat.
For me it is a daily treat.
Messy fingers and clothes
will not deter my desire
for these orange-colored treats
even if my laundry bills soar.
What the heck?
Life without Cheetos?
Forget that, Jack!
Renting a Tree House
Stuart Watkins
No rooms to let in Lake Oswego
Tree house only option to go
Sharing airspace with nearby tree
Oxygen and fresh air free
Reach down pluck cherries
Spit out the seeds
New trees grow
Between the weeds
Not so bad to live up high
Night stars light up the sky
As my eyes take their rest
Owls watch from their nest
Birds announce morning is here
Underneath this tree are three deer
I’ll sign a lease for a year or two
Fun way to face life anew