MPWGA 2022 Beach Bums Tournament

Beach bombshells anchored and recovering after bumming around the golf course (left to right): Connie Simonds, Midge Mollenkoph, Diane Cain, Donna Yon (photo courtesy of Andrea Gray)

Ann Lange

Golf can be the biggest pain in the grass you’ve ever had unless, of course, you’re always landing in sand bunkers, and then it’s really a beach! To add a little beach bunker buffoonery to the game, the beach lovers either holed out on the green or beached out in the sand. On July 19 at The Preserve Golf Club, 56 sorority sandbox sisters from the SaddleBrooke TWO and SaddleBrooke Ranch golf clubs packed their beach bags with hard, little beach balls, towels, bunker juice, and an illegal 15th club called a hand wedge. The sand seekers revved up their dune buggies and took off for an 18-hole beach party.

Teams of four were comprised of two pairs of beach bum buddies, with each pair contributing one best net score on each hole to the team score. One pair played to the green, ending by putting into the cup. The other played to the green-side bunker flagged as the “beach,” ending when the ball landed in the sand. The beach belles alternated being a grass lass or a beach peach, playing for the land green or sand green, as indicated on the scorecards. It was hard to retrain one’s ball to go bonkers ‘n bunkers, decide which club would reach the beach, or whether to stay and play with the beach toys. There was no such thing as a beach bummer, unless you tried to hole out in a bunker when you shouldn’t have, landed in the wrong bunker, or got way too much sand between your toes visiting more than your share of nine of The Preserve’s 51 bunkers. Some sunbaked, sand-brained beach enthusiasts did just that, but most were careful not to fall into that trap.

Following the bunkermania, the beached babes sat on their bums at The Beach Bum Ballroom for an awards ceremony, lunch, and a blended beach beverage with a fancy umbrella, the event special thirst-quenching Mai Tai. As the sun-soaked sandy sirens enjoyed their blackened chicken Caesar salads, Debbie McMullin, the creative brainstorm of this event, asked the group to chew quietly as she gave recognition to others who had helped make all this bunker bunk such a sand-tastic time: Jessica Ward and the food and beverage staff; Kim Cox for tablescapes of yellow-faced golf balls in their sunglasses lying on chaise lounges; Carole Ericksen for making 18 sets of colorful beach ball tee markers; Rennie Temple for serving as marshal; and Paul Hallock, director of Golf Course Maintenance, who came in on his day off to set up the tee boxes and beaches.

We appreciate our beach boys, Matt Hudson, Mike Karpe, and Richard Easley, working in three-part harmony, keeping those good vibrations a-happenin’ at our golf shops and events. Mike announced the 36 sand angels who took home sand dollars in the form of SaddleBrooke TWO credit from the four winning places in each of two flights. The first-place winners in the Star Fish Flight were Denny Dalton, Jackie Kline, Lan Nguyen, and Mary Kay Nordhill. The first-place winners in the Jelly Fish Flight were Marilyn Brewer, Carey Ricard, Pam Horwitt, and Deb Lawson. The beach beauties who landed on the par-3 grass greens, just an itsy bitsy, teenie weenie way from the polka dot, were: #4 Kim Cox, #6 Cathy Quesnell, #11 Carol Mihal, #14 Gail Campbell.

Boatloads of thanks to our tournament sponsor, Wildfire Wing Company, for their generous gift packs and prizes. Lori Stegink, MPWGA sponsorship chair, introduced Josh Bishop and Brent Ralston. Josh announced the KP winners and surprised these beach bum chums by also giving payouts to their partners. Every player left with a gift card to use at either Wildfire Wing Company or Fork & Fire.

The SaddleBrooke Sandman visits us to sprinkle his magical sand so that every morning we wake up still living our wonderful dream. We are grateful to live in a place where we laugh and play together, help each other and our surrounding community, and appreciate our blessings.