Dolores Robu
People in deep grief are often too lost in their own sorrow to identify their needs.
It’s okay to ask how you might help; but just know you can step in and help.
For instance, if it’s after the funeral at a reception and the trash needs to be taken out – don’t ask, just help. In the old days we would gather around the loved one and just do things for them. Bring over some food so that they don’t have to cook but can still eat well. You probably know their life—offer to make phone calls, cancel appointments or offer to take them on errands.
The holidays are upon us; be sure to offer to include the bereaved in activities that are peaceful. Too much merry making is overwhelming.
10 Best Things to Say to Someone in Grief:
I am so sorry for your loss.
I wish I had the right words, just know I care.
I don’t know how you feel, but I am here to help in any way I can.
You and your loved one will be in my thoughts and prayers.
My favorite memory of your loved one is….
I am always just a phone call away.
Give a hug instead of saying something.
We all need help at times like this, I am here for you.
I am usually up early or late, if you need anything.
Saying nothing, just be with the person. (Sometimes say, “I don’t know what to say.”).
Don’t say:
At least she lived a long life
I know how you feel
He is in a better place.
Take advantage of SaddleBrooke’s Bereavement Group, which meets in the Coyote Room every Sunday from 4:00-5:30 p.m.
You can bring your friend to the group the first time. There he/she will find grievers like themselves, ready to share their story. Grieving in a group normalizes that which feels anything but normal. The group is always led by a facilitator and is free to all residents of SaddleBrooke One and Two.
If you have any questions call Dolores at 825-8980.